take a deep breath, and button up your shirt.

I set my glasses on the table next to my computer, so I can see life the way god intended me to.

I feel nervous of things that are ahead of me, I dont think people really know how afraid of things I am. I put on this act like I am just a giant loud funny guy, but I am really scared of things. Like People, people scare me. On the outside it looks like I can talk to any one about any thing, but in reality it is hard for me inside.
I worry about her, the one I love. I always wonder what she is doing or what she is thinking. I wonder is she ever stops to think about How I am doing..
Sometimes I feel alone, but I know I am not. but doesn't it always seem like you are in those moments were love fails you, and no is there?
well sometimes I find solace in the fact of being alone. sometimes its nice to not have any one there and you can just be yourself and be left to your thoughts.

Life seems to be moving so fast, but painfully slow at the same time.. I am scared of next fall. she is moving away, and I dont know when I will ever see her. and that scares me. I am going to school full time so that means tons of homework. I will be twenty years old this fall.
every things just seems like a dream. everything feels like I am about to wake up and start my real life, in the city with my future wife in our little apartment..
when will I wake up? maybe when she says "I do"

for those seeing in reverse

man, I need to keep up dating this thing.
I love you all. :)